I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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