I wish I could teleport
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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