I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
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