Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
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