real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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