im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize
