yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
she smelled like a LAN party
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
