I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I would fuck him just for his dog
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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