he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
