I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
