is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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