remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
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