It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
