yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
