I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I wear drunk well.
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