therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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