i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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