the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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