i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize