and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
