me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Randomize
