Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Randomize
