they need to just BURY HIM!
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
