i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
