My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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