The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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