Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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