why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
