"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
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