I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just cropdusted the office
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
