I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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