nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Randomize