i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
