Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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