Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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