Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize