It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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