Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
