just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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