is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Randomize