dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
