Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
