we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
