i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think im going to throw up on grandma
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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