you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
