i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
nutella sex= disaster
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
