everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
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