Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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