Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
