You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
