i can't believe i had my finger in that
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
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